I don’t need a mirror. I have a 5-year-old with no filter.

When do I know it’s time to go get my color touched up because the red’s turned a bit brassy? When Emma Kelly tells me, “Mommy, you’re hair is orange.”

When do I know it’s time for vacation and/or a trip to the plastic surgeon? When Emma Kelly asks me, “Mommy, why do you have bags under your eyes?”

When do I know it’s time to renew my gym membership? When Emma Kelly is in need of comfort so she cuddles up beside me to knead my upper arm like it’s a Pillow Pet.

Every time she throws out one of her observations, I reply with a not-so-sincere “Thank you.” But I’ve found that sarcasm is lost on 5-year-olds. So last night after I got the “bags under the eyes” comment which I followed up with my usual “thank you,” I tried to explain to my precious baby child that it’s not nice to tell people that they have bags under their eyes. So she asks, “Then why did you say ‘thank you’?”

Touche.

Don’t you hate when something is about to happen in your life, and people are constantly making you doubt your decision? You got a new job, and the people that work at your new company keep giving you the, “are you SURE you want to come work here?” Or when you meet a nice person, go on a date, and one thing leads to another, and now your friends are telling you that you should definitely go get checked out at the clinic… but, they don’t really give you a reason (note: that has never happened to me. haha). Or you let a brand new show on Oprah’s network film you and your entire family to try to fix a pretty big conflict… and your wife gets a call from the executive producer of the show two days before the episode airs. In this call they ask your wife if you would be interested in going to therapy. Excuse me? Why should I go to therapy? I thought Iyanla fixed my life. The words, “we will even pay for it” were thrown out there too. Hmmmm….

I may be looking too deep into it. Maybe this is standard. Maybe they are just trying to be nice. Maybe they feel the episode may cause me to have some sort of mental breakdown that will require tons of treatment. Ha! Yup, now I am trippin a bit. Kinsey keeps telling me it will be ok. Guess we will find out Saturday night, because I am done trying to act like nothing is happening. Too many people have hit me up and told me they saw the preview, and some of those people include old friends from back home, including some of my former football buddies. Question? Why are there 29 year old dudes watching the OWN network, anyway? They, technically, should not be making fun of me. So lets just hope that the therapy offering is not because they make me look like huge monster on TV. Side note: Oprah never called us back

Good news/ Bad news: Kinsey’s former boss hit me up and said he wanted to take me to a Charger game… in New Orleans! Problem: they play on a Sunday night, and I would not get back home in time to be at work on time. Dang it! Luckily, he said he would take me to a different one that is not played on a Sunday night at 8pm. This is when I wish the NFL played on Saturdays and College games were on Sunday.

Check out the preview of J-Si on Iyanla’s Fix My Life Sat 9/22 at 10/9c on OWN.